Apparently, this is a "hoax" - see http://www.snopes.com/crime/justice/mugger.asp. But actually, it may be closer to satire.
Geoff Layton
Date: Fri, 25 Nov 2011 13:32:52 -0800
From: [log in to unmask]
Subject: Fw: Actual Craig's List ad
To: [log in to unmask]
Any body with a problem with the 2nd Amendment??
----- Forwarded Message -----
From: Humor Ambrosi <[log in to unmask]>
To: Undisclosed-Recipient:;>@NONE
Sent: Wednesday, November 23, 2011 7:10 PM
Subject: Fw: Actual Craig's List ad
-----
AN ACTUAL CRAIG'S LIST
PERSONALS AD
To the Guy Who Tried to Mug Me in Downtown
Savannah night before last.
Date: 2010-09-27, 1:43 a.m.
E.S.T.
I was the guy wearing the black Burberry jacket
that you demanded that I hand over, shortly after you pulled the
knife on me and my girlfriend, threatening our lives. You also asked
for my girlfriend's purse and earrings. I can only hope that you
somehow come across this rather important message.
First, I'd like to apologize for your
embarrassment; I didn't expect you to actually crap in your pants
when I drew my pistol after you took my jacket.. The evening was not
that cold, and I was wearing the jacket for a reason.. my girlfriend
was happy that I just returned safely from my 2nd tour as a Combat
Marine in Afghanistan .. She had just bought me that Kimber Custom
Model 1911 .45 ACP pistol for my birthday, and we had picked up a
shoulder holster for it that very evening. Obviously you agree that
it is a very intimidating weapon when pointed at your head ... isn't
it?!
I know it probably wasn't fun walking back to
wherever you'd come from with crap in your pants. I'm sure it was
even worse walking bare-footed since I made you leave your shoes,
cell phone, and wallet with me. [That prevented you from calling or
running to your buddies to come help mug us again].
After I called your mother or "Momma" as you
had her listed in your cell, I explained the entire episode of what
you'd done. Then I went and filled up my gas tank as well as those
of four other people in the gas station, -- on your credit card. The
guy with the big motor home took 153 gallons and was extremely
grateful!
I gave your shoes to a homeless guy outside
Vinnie Van Go Go's, along with all the cash in your wallet. [That
made his day!]
I then threw your wallet into the big pink
"pimp mobile" that was parked at the curb .... after I broke the
windshield and side window and keyed the entire driver's side of the
car.
Earlier, I managed to get in two threatening
phone calls to the DA's office and one to the FBI, while mentioning
President Obama as my possible target.
The FBI guy seemed really intense and we had a
nice long chat (I guess while he traced your number
etc.).
;In a way, perhaps I should apologize for not
killing you ... but I feel this type of retribution is a far more
appropriate punishment for your threatened crime. I wish you well as
you try to sort through some of these rather immediate pressing
issues, and can only hope that you have the opportunity to reflect
upon, and perhaps reconsider, the career path you've chosen to
pursue in life.. Remember, next time you might not be so lucky. Have
a good day!
Thoughtfully yours, Semper Fi!
Alex
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