These are funny! Thanks!
Beth Rapp Young, Ph.D.
Associate Professor
Department of English
University of Central Florida
P.O. Box 161346
12790 Aquarius Agora Dr.
Orlando, FL 32816-1346
[log in to unmask]
________________________________________
From: Assembly for the Teaching of English Grammar <[log in to unmask]> on behalf of John Chorazy <[log in to unmask]>
Sent: Monday, March 12, 2018 10:34:04 AM
To: [log in to unmask]
Subject: Fwd: Grammar
Passing along a belated nod to National Grammar Day...
A dangling participle walks into a bar. Enjoying a cocktail and chatting with the bartender, the evening passes pleasantly.
A bar was walked into by the passive voice.
An oxymoron walked into a bar, and the silence was deafening.
Two quotation marks walk into a “bar.”
A malapropism walks into a bar, looking for all intensive purposes like a wolf in cheap clothing, muttering epitaphs and casting dispersions on his magnificent other, who takes him for granite.
Hyperbole totally rips into this insane bar and absolutely destroys everything.
A question mark walks into a bar?
A non sequitur walks into a bar. In a strong wind, even turkeys can fly.
Papyrus and Comic Sans walk into a bar. The bartender says, "Get out -- we don't serve your type."
A mixed metaphor walks into a bar, seeing the handwriting on the wall but hoping to nip it in the bud.
A comma splice walks into a bar, it has a drink and then leaves.
Three intransitive verbs walk into a bar. They sit. They converse. They depart.
A synonym strolls into a tavern.
At the end of the day, a cliché walks into a bar -- fresh as a daisy, cute as a button, and sharp as a tack.
A run-on sentence walks into a bar it starts flirting. With a cute little sentence fragment.
Falling slowly, softly falling, the chiasmus collapses to the bar floor.
A figure of speech literally walks into a bar and ends up getting figuratively hammered.
An allusion walks into a bar, despite the fact that alcohol is its Achilles heel.
The subjunctive would have walked into a bar, had it only known.
A misplaced modifier walks into a bar owned a man with a glass eye named Ralph.
The past, present, and future walked into a bar. It was tense.
A dyslexic walks into a bra.
A verb walks into a bar, sees a beautiful noun, and suggests they conjugate. The noun declines.
An Oxford comma walks into a bar, where it spends the evening watching the television getting drunk and smoking cigars.
A simile walks into a bar, as parched as a desert.
A gerund and an infinitive walk into a bar, drinking to forget.
A hyphenated word and a non-hyphenated word walk into a bar and the bartender nearly chokes on the irony.
--
John Chorazy
English III, AP Lit, AP Language
Advisor, Panther Press and PTHS Book Club
Pequannock Township High School
973.616.6000
Learning is a process, not an event.
To join or leave this LISTSERV list, please visit the list's web interface at: http://listserv.muohio.edu/archives/ateg.html<https://na01.safelinks.protection.outlook.com/?url=http%3A%2F%2Flistserv.muohio.edu%2Farchives%2Fateg.html&data=02%7C01%7CBeth.Young%40UCF.EDU%7Caa186ed13095446b5eb208d588267d4a%7Cbb932f15ef3842ba91fcf3c59d5dd1f1%7C0%7C1%7C636564621254412243&sdata=4BbL90KP8LaimG%2FCJ5aYzpGGBncj7wv0aYxQP2gcOQA%3D&reserved=0> and select "Join or leave the list"
Visit ATEG's web site at http://ateg.org/<https://na01.safelinks.protection.outlook.com/?url=http%3A%2F%2Fateg.org%2F&data=02%7C01%7CBeth.Young%40UCF.EDU%7Caa186ed13095446b5eb208d588267d4a%7Cbb932f15ef3842ba91fcf3c59d5dd1f1%7C0%7C1%7C636564621254412243&sdata=KWAPE8sHmT4AApo0eJEDU6v365vToNLbqVdfj%2FBc0Sc%3D&reserved=0>
To join or leave this LISTSERV list, please visit the list's web interface at:
http://listserv.muohio.edu/archives/ateg.html
and select "Join or leave the list"
Visit ATEG's web site at http://ateg.org/
|
